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PoM's One Shot Requests

Started by Gonff the Mousethief, March 29, 2015, 05:00:36 AM

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Which is my best story?

Nothing More
0 (0%)
Bird One Shot
0 (0%)
Of Lies and Truth
0 (0%)
For If the Light
0 (0%)
Hope in the Wind (Sand's request)
3 (100%)

Total Members Voted: 3

Skyblade

Ooh, very nice! I like that concept too :) Great poem, Gonff.

Thanks, MatthiasMan, for the avatar!

Gonff the Mousethief

Thank you very much Sky! I had such fun writing this, so sorry if it turned out wrong Cap'n!

*Hides in Hobbit Hole*
I want the world of Tolkien,
The message of Lewis;
The adventure of Jacques,
And the heart of Milne.
But I want the originality of me.



CaptainRocktree

*Knocks on Hobbit Hole door* *Peeks inside*
That was absolutely amazing Gonff! I can't get over it! It was even better then what I expected! The twist was fantastic, I've always loved the Ents  ;D. It was fabulous, absolutely fabulous! Amazing job once again Sir Gonff!  :)
Not all those who wander are lost.
J.R.R Tolkien

Skyblade

Absolutely! So stop hiding and be proud of your work! You've got talent...and if you think otherwise, you're misled and being a fool.

Thanks, MatthiasMan, for the avatar!

Gonff the Mousethief

@Roc: What you said Cap'n made literal tears come to my eyes. I'm just glad I got one thing right for a change. Glad you liked it.

@Sky: I know I shoudl be proud of it, but whenever I get attention/get told something of mine is good, I always think they are lying, even if they honestly mean it. Its something I try so hard to stop. Fool of a Took I am then. Thanks Sky. ;)
I want the world of Tolkien,
The message of Lewis;
The adventure of Jacques,
And the heart of Milne.
But I want the originality of me.



CaptainRocktree

@PoM: One thing right for a change? You are putting your self down! Your a great person Gonff, And I'm glad to have you as a friend.   ;)
Not all those who wander are lost.
J.R.R Tolkien

Lady Ashenwyte

Could you write a story about a rat and a badger fighting, with both of them dying in the end?
The fastest way to a man's heart- Or anyone's, in fact- Is to tear a hole through their chest.

Indeed. You are as ancient as the soot that choked Pompeii into oblivion, though not quite as uncaring. - Rusvul

Just a butterfly struggling through my chrysalis.

Captain Tammo

Wow I love the ent poem, Gonff!
"Cowards die a thousand times, a warrior only dies once. The spirits of all you have slain are watching you, Vilu Daskar, and they will rest in peace now that your time has come. You must die as you have lived, a coward to the last!" -Luke the warrior

Gonff the Mousethief

@Ash: Sure thing! Sounds like an interesting topic!

@Tammo: Thank you very much Tammo! Means a whole lot!
I want the world of Tolkien,
The message of Lewis;
The adventure of Jacques,
And the heart of Milne.
But I want the originality of me.



Gonff the Mousethief

Here you go Ash! I know its not the best with probably a few errors, but I hope I get my point across. I kinda depressed myself with the ending. Anywho, enjoy!



        In the Hands of Another


"You know it's always musty in the Swamp. Bugs and Bogs was what Ma always said, and was she right. Even at my age now I still don't know why she loved the place. All I ever saw was piles of rotting trees and mud pits which no beast should go near. Ah well, at least tomorrow I get to see the old ant tomorrow! She's going to be surprised!"
Rentar Shuzere gazed up at his accomplice for the time being. The small heron gave him an awkward look, turning his head when the Badger had finished talking.
"Skwaaaah!" yelled the bird as it flew off. A large sigh left the large beast. Hopefully that would not be the reaction his mother had when he told her the news: Him and Madame Syull's daughter were engaged! Madame Syull was not the best of friends with Lily Shuzere. Hopefully, that didn't affect their children's love. Oh how great it felt! Both had known each other since youth, and decided to go to Salamandastorn's schooling/training when they reached the proper age. Now, both in their final year, were about to become one and start a family! What more could his mother ask!
The sun was walking down the blue hill on which it lay as Rentar hiked through the Bog filled Marsh. He looked up at the Sky, watching it change colors from baby blue to the soft, warm pink.
"Never really enjoyed those Sunsets. Every beast in a bird's reach would go on and on 'bout them, while I just liked the sun normal and such. Wot so grand about them anyway?"
"They are pretty y' ken."
Rentar turned around fast at the sound of the voice. What he saw was an old slinky rat, out fitted in nothing but old rags, a blue bandana (Which was patched up in the back with a different color fabric, which means it's probably two smaller shrew ones sewed together), and a rusty, broken sword in his left paw, for he had a stub on the other.
"W-wha-, who are you?"
"Me names Bolgarg, wanderer o' these here parts. Na, wot be a big ol' Badger like yurslef doin' yonderin' so far away from that big ol' mountain ey?"
"I've come to visit me- You know, I shouldn't tell ya. You aren't the type I should be trusting."
"Oh come on mate, I ain't gon 'urt yah," said Bolgarg as he walked closer towards the Badger with his sword drawn. Rentar had his hand ready on his war axe.
"Back away. Just keep on, I want nothing to do with you."
"Fine matey, I didn't want notin' t' do with you either." The rat walked right on past Rentar. He looked back at the rat once he had moved, and continued on his way. While taking a deep breath of relief, he felt a stinging pain in his right thigh. He looked down and saw a dart dripping with green goo protruding from his leg. Upon pulling it out, his vision became blurry and his balance was beginning to be thrown off. To add to his, Bolgarg ran up, and jumped on the badgers back, sinking his teeth into the black and white fur.
"Ah! Get off me!" He shook his body, letting the rat fly to the earth. In an attempt to grab his axe, Rentar's vision shifted for the worse, as he saw multiple axe's spinning in the air. A sharp pain was felt in right leg as the rat hit it with his sword, collapsing the Badger to his knees. Rentar had a sensory over load, as he was half-blind by both the drug and blood wrath, pain from both the dart and the sword, and the surprise from the rat.
"Heh, never knew it s' east t' take down a Badger eh?"
The Badger gazed up at his opponent. His nimble body have an awful feeling in the Badger's stomach. Was this how he was going to go? What about his Mum, and his fiancé? No, he can't die here!
As Bolgarg brought down his sword, Rentar grabbed his axe and met it in mid air, throwing the rat off balance. At once, the badger got up, still in a sickening state, and kicked the rat in the side, breaking a few ribs. Cries of pain escaped the rat upon impact.
"Don't 'urt me! Please! Ii got a loife!"
All Rentar could do was smirk. He set his axe down and picked up the helpless beast, turning around to the nearest bog. It was hard to see in the now early night, but he knew exactly what to do. In a matter of seconds, Rentar threw him with all of his might into the swamp, watching the steaming mud devour Bolgarg. More screams left him as he sank deeper and deeper. At the moment his head went under, a small reed popped up from the goo, and shot one last dart at his foe. It whistled through the air, eventually landing in the Badger's chest. The world seemed to stop when the young beast felt the pain once more. He again went dizzy, and was hit hard with hallucinations. Finally, he could no longer keep himself up and fell to the ground, out cold.

Hours later he awoke. He felt a warm substance around his body, encasing him. The smell was musty and foul, making him scrunch his nose. His senses came to when he felt a pain in his heart every time it beat. Rentar took a good look around. He was half way sunken into the bog! His arms were stuck, his legs were stuck, for the only thing above ground was his head. He quickly drew the conclusion that he had tumbled in while drunk.
"Help! Some beast help me! I'm stuck!" he cried, but to no avail. The Badger let out another cry this time, but for pain, as the mud seeped into his leg wounds and was pressing against the dart stuck deep in his chest. Oh the pain! It seared so bad, he might pass out again just from that. He had to get out. The only thing he could do was try to move his arms out. In doing that, it only sunk him deeper and deeper. The young man started to bawl like a child. He would never tell nor see his mother again, nor his girlfriend. He would never have kids and visit his Mum on holidays. He could never accomplish anything ever again, for he was already dead.

When the sun rose high that morning, creating a wonderful dawn, there was nothing to be seen of either the rat or badger. Fate had bestowed their lives in each other's hands, one for no loss, the other for all the greater.
I want the world of Tolkien,
The message of Lewis;
The adventure of Jacques,
And the heart of Milne.
But I want the originality of me.



LT Sandpaw


Hey that was good P-o-M (Did I get it right? :P) Anyway I was wondering if I could request a slave uprising from you, preferably in the bottom of a galley ship in a Redwall setting. But Plot Twist they don't succeed and are either killed or recaptured. Only one creature actually gets away and is set adrift on a piece of driftwood thinking he might as well die from the ocean.

While down below decks the survivors of the uprising are punished.

What I'm looking for is a tragedy oneshot where a small hope is crushed and has to be rekindled say in the future. Something that can only be imagined.

Think your up for it?


"Sometimes its not about winning, but how you lose." - John Gwynne

"Facts don't care about your feelings." -Ben Shapiro

Gonff the Mousethief

#41
Sounds like a good idea SaLt! I'd love to do it!

Edit: The autocorrect on my phone made it say Sounds like idea SaLt! Not Sounds like a good idea SaLt! I'm sorry for that *Shuffles feet*
I want the world of Tolkien,
The message of Lewis;
The adventure of Jacques,
And the heart of Milne.
But I want the originality of me.



LT Sandpaw

#42
Cool, I can't wait to see how it turns out.

Edit: Its fine, happens all the time. Anyway I don't mean to sound pushy but how's the oneshot coming?


"Sometimes its not about winning, but how you lose." - John Gwynne

"Facts don't care about your feelings." -Ben Shapiro

Gonff the Mousethief

I'm terribly sorry SaLt. Life and school have just been so busy lately. I plan to re it out tomorrow. So sorry!
I want the world of Tolkien,
The message of Lewis;
The adventure of Jacques,
And the heart of Milne.
But I want the originality of me.



LT Sandpaw


Don't worry about it, its better to have a solid well polished work come out slowly then to have a rushed bad one. Take all the time you need.


"Sometimes its not about winning, but how you lose." - John Gwynne

"Facts don't care about your feelings." -Ben Shapiro