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Started by Banya, December 08, 2016, 04:50:46 PM

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When should a young adult move away from their parents? (high school refers to public, private, or homeschool education)

when they become a legal adult (age 18) and finish high school, whichever happens later
in their late teens/early 20s, when they finish school, whether high school or higher ed., and begin working
whenever they become totally financially independent, even if it takes several years after finishing school
no matter their higher education/employment circumstances, they should be on their own by their mid- to late-twenties
they don't ever *have* to
other

The Skarzs

Another option is to find one of your bezt friendz to board with so you can split the rent and wifi and utilities. Unfortunately I don't have that option.

A reason I believe many young folks don't move out is that they aren't prepared. They aren't taught important things like taxes and what really goes into lving life, and thus are not prepared mentally when they suddenly decide to make decisions that are way bigger than they initially thought and are immediately crushed under the weight of their ignorance. I'm not saying it is their fault entirely, as their guardians must, in my opinion, prepare them for such happenings, but- and this is only my thoughts- if they don't choose to pursue the proper knowledge then they are doomed to get knocked down.
Cave of Skarzs

Cave potato.

MeadowR

'Whenever they are financially dependent...'

These be tough times. I don't know about other countries, but at least in England, house prices have kept going up and up, but not so much wages, and it is very hard for young people to start out now as their parents once did. Most will rent, but even that can be costly, and you're better to find someone to share with to spread some costs. With university fees too, unless you can find a fitting job pretty soon after, you may be stuck finding something irrelevant to your studies, and something that you could have been doing if you hadn't gone to university, so that may not pay your way to realistically go independent from your parents.

I'm a good one for this question, I suppose, seeing as I am late 20s and am still living at home. At this stage I could not realistically afford to move out. Even if I could move in with a partner or other share, I'd still need to be sure to get a job which would properly finance me. Sadly what I'd ideally like to do is not something which will constantly rake in money and I am facing uncertain times at the moment which again would keep me best here. What I will say for myself is that I have spent a few months living away from home since uni (which was also elsewhere), so it's not like I've never experienced independence.

It has become less taboo (thankfully) to still be living with parents because of the financial difficulties nowadays; although it still feels like sooner or later you should become more independent. Wait too long and it could be awkward and more difficult to 'launch' for various reason. I think it is fair enough and fine that young adults need to stay home for a while, but if they can at least experience some time from home, some time to get some independence, in their 20s, then great. And of course if you're happy and able to become independent in your 20s, then that's great, too. 18 feels quite young to me to become fully independent, but that is when many here will start university, so they'll get their first taste of it.

To approach it from another view, and reading what Skarz has said, I would agree that youngsters are not properly prepared for real life post-school, such as how taxes work, bank-related things, and a gazillion more things. Guardians can do so much, but I think it is primarily at school where these things should be explained. The place where you're supposed to learn and be prepared for working life, should be where you're also learning how to be prepared for other important things in life to at least give you some chance of being a more rounded, knowledgeable person. I think it's utterly ridiculous that they didn't go through these things at school. Maybe they do a bit now, but not when I was there. You can learn with experience some things, but some things it can take time to understand. I've felt stupid plenty of times when people have just expected me to understand these things 'just like that'. You can try and look up online 'how tos' these days, yet I find they're often not very clear, and there's contradicting information.

I think I've probably gone away from the question -- what even was the question? ;D Also I'm sure I've forgotten to include a few points. I think there's something relevant somewhere in these many lines...
~*Meadow*~

Season Namer 2014

Andy

Honestly, school, even college/university, does nothing to prepare people for the so-called "real world" like they always said in school. As a child and teen I didn't pay attention to the adult stuff my folks were doing unless I had to, and as a result, upon graduating college (which, I might add I had to live at home during even because I couldn't afford a housing plan) found myself underprepared for adulting. At 23, I was trained for a job that doesn't exist around here and knew nothing about working real jobs and very little about taxes and such. If I'd known what I know now, I wouldn't have gone to college, and would have instead just gotten a job, because I've now spent the last year or so learning to adult properly and not only am I not capable of getting a job that would make me financially independent (as entry level work doesn't do that and what I'm trained to do doesn't exist here) but my parents also need my assistance oftentimes to keep the whole family afloat. So yeah, when people are financially able to move out is when they should.
Only actions can speak the truth.

The Skarzs

Well. . . unfortunately there are very few jobs that will actually make you financially independent.
Cave of Skarzs

Cave potato.

Andy

Aye, that is the problem. As MeadowRabbit said, prices have gone up, but wages have not followed.
Only actions can speak the truth.

Ashleg

So you gotta perhaps have multiple jobs.

The Skarzs

And then you have no life. :P
Cave of Skarzs

Cave potato.

Andy

Some people can and do pull off multiple jobs. I'm not personally capable of that. Too much stress in life from things other than work as well as from work. People who can do that and don't mind doing it, or absolutely have to do it, that's exactly what they do.  Some people have too many external factors for multiple jobs, though.

In my case, depression, anxiety, and stress aside, the fact that my family has 5 people and 2 cars and I've gotta take care of getting my 9-year-old cousin to and from school (on foot), I couldn't take a second job, or go full time, if I wanted to (or if work would let me; I know the "full time" employees at my job often aren't given that many hours and in fact I'm worked more than some of them).
Only actions can speak the truth.

The Skarzs

Cave of Skarzs

Cave potato.