The Gallows

[Groddil]

Here, on this hallowed cellar soil, do we sentence those who have wronged us to the highest order of punishment. Death!

Executions will be presided over by myself, Lord Ashenwyte, and Guest #971248.

Today's execution is of several thieves, who stole jokes from me to the value of 1 thousand units of comedy.

Sky of Blades, Chipster of Noonvale, Rosie of Willowwater, and Lady of Amber. You have been sentenced to death. Please insert your necks into the nooses, and we shall make this quick. Resist, and we will put you down like dogs.

* Several soldiers point muskets at the criminals menacingly.

More executions will follow. Most likely moderators. Except Sierra.

[Rosie Willowwater]

@Sierra save me!

[Luftwaffles]

I'll give you an infinite supply of mad-looking hats in exchange for this maiden's life.

[Groddil]

You cannot bribe the law. Moderators think themselves above it, but this has gone on too long!

It's time for a lynching!

* Groddil forces Rosie Willowwater's neck into a noose and tightens it.

[Rosie Willowwater]

Well, I am only 0'1" tall so nothing can hurt me.

[Luftwaffles]

I AM the law.

[Groddil]

* Groddil puts Rosie on a stool.

You'll still suffocate when I kick the stool out.

[Rosie Willowwater]

The noose is too big for me

[Groddil]

* Groddil stuffs Rosie's neck into a noose her size.

Unhappy now?

[Ungatt Trunn]

Wouldn't the guillotine be more efficient, comrade Groddil? Then we would have no issue of the noose's being too big or the criminals being too short!

[Rosie Willowwater]

*Runs away because forum magic*

[Groddil]

Quite right, Comrade Trunn.

* Groddil traps Rosie under a glass jar.

Keep these criminals detained. I shall construct a specialised guillotine using sharpened Ushanka hats in place of the blade. Very effective.

[Chipster of Noonvale]

...

[Groddil]

* Ungatt Trunn pulls Groddil out of the Land of Obscure References.

You're forgetting something. Aussies. Eat. Rabbits.

* Groddil ribs the Black Rabbit of Inle's leg off and eats it raw.

[Chipster of Noonvale]

...